I am a strong feminist. By saying this I don’t mean that I am in that school of thought that believes men are dogs, idiots, have no manners e.t.c. I believe in the empowerment of women. I believe that in women being treated right everywhere they go and being given equal opportunities to men. I believe that they ought to know that they are special, unique and should not tolerate any trash that tends to demean their existence. Women can think and make decisions. Women can work and earn their own money. Women can do many things that men can do except one thing. It is not their role to head homes unless maybe otherwise you are a single parent by circumstances. This makes it very crucial for a woman to be careful who they choose as the man of their lives. You will live with the consequences of your choices. Woe unto you if you choose a drunkard or a lazy male species for a man in the name of love. You will have to listen and do what he says and worse your children will be like that. Let me give you a different scenario. If you by any chance get married to a man who thinks women are trash simply because you think you don’t deserve much better, you are in trouble. You will live all your life with this tag and regrets of what could have been. Sometimes I think its much better to wait and curb your running emotions and hormones instead of making the worst blander in marrying these crazy men who deserve no iota of honor!
Anyway, my story today was not helping you choose your perfect match. My writing today is to give you reasons why you should say no to independence. I have heard many women and men too saying that they don’t want to get married, marriages are boring, marriages don’t work, marriage is for old people all that crap. Let me give you news flash. Marriage is all about you and the other person. Marriage is about making a commitment to make it work despite of and in spite of the challenges you face. It is all about finding someone who compliments you, makes you better everyday. Two are better than one my friend. I know you are in self denial trying to convince yourself how much you love your independence and how much you just want to achieve all that stuff and that you are not thinking of marriage. You are lying to yourself. I know you day dream everyday of your pretty children having your pretty eyes, calling you mummy or daddy. Having someone to hold you when things are tough, having that one person who believe in you when no one believes in you, who will stand by you, stick with you through thick and thin…I know, right now you are caught up with the perfect picture that am painting in your mind like Michaelangalo or that artist that you see in your mind.. To be honest, I have no clue of another great artist. I left art in primary school and never did anything that proves I have art knowledge except for the crazy sculptures that were supposed to add up to my final exams marks. That is the only time that a Nairobi student is ever serious about stuff. When it’s coming in the exams. You should have seen how I was as busy as a bee making honey trying to build something that will never be beneficial to me. How annoying! Anyway, I’ll try to see whether I have a calling in that..
Back to my story on independence, still painting the picture. Don’t you want to see yourself saying I do to the man or woman of your dreams and plan a wonderful honeymoon trip to Hawaii or Zanzibar and create fantastic memories along the ocean ..Let me not go any further..Marriage is beautiful. It is people that corrupt it. There is nothing beautiful about being single. Nothing at all. Spending lonely nights in bed, withstanding stupid questions from buffoons who think that your life is their business so they keep on asking when you are getting married. Sometimes, I feel like making them eat my shoe or ..let me not say what I wanted to say. It is so vulgar and it is against my moral ethics to employ such words in my writing or even in my conversation. But one is tempted to tell them to back off. I know you hate the silence of that house the moment you walk in and have to disturb the peace of your neighbors by putting on loud music. I know that watching wedding shows or magazines bores you to death and you have developed this sarcasm against marriages and your friends that are getting married.
Straight up, marriage is beautiful and just because someone hurt you doesn’t mean that you won’t find love again. Just believe and watch out!!!